11:57PM

So where was I... we were talking about the stars and something about a new beginnings... It's difficult to recall since this past month has gone by in an absolute blur. So what have I been up to? Lets see... First of all there were all kinds of deadlines that needed to be met - with the end of Semester approaching and end of the year... blah blah blah. I just kind of got caught up in everything.  There were bills to pay - which my new Brazilian neighbours helped me figure out (since none of us speak Arabic and were all lost in translation) - and there was shopping to do, and friends to meet.  And then suddenly, like some kind of Jack-In-The-Box surprise, Jeddah's weather became something truly spectacular and I just could not keep myself indoors which is surprising considering that it's still between 28C and 31C (82F - 88F) and this is mid-winter.  So the past four weeks have been non-stop work and loads of basking in this: and and ...

I was always curious to know what's happening in the stars. Not that I believe that anyone can predict the future - absolutely not. But there were definitely cosmic events at play at some point in the past that have somehow influenced my life. At least I think so. When I had this conversation with a friend and a bunch of colleagues a few months ago, I was met with wild, savage laughter. "There is no way that a planet, any planet moving around the galaxy, can have an impact on anyone", I was told.  That may be true I reckoned. And then I did something even I wasn't planning to do. I pointed to the moon - which at that point was gloriously full - and asked the group to explain to me how that ball in the sky controls our tides and all kinds of activity here on earth, including accelerated agricultural (and hair) growth and well-being, as well as influencing the behaviour of many people according to long established beliefs?  And if indeed the moon had the...

So there I was, sitting with my coffee and scrolling through Facebook on a Friday morning when I came across this video by Simon Sinek and Tom Bilyeu on what's missing in the Millenial generation.  And my good Lord, I have never ever come across a description of Millennials - especially in this current wave of Generational Wars - that is better articulated and elucidated. If  ever! Sinek eloquently highlights the growing epidemic of failed parenting strategies coupled with the increasingly delusional world of technology – highlighting how technology feeds our delusions while simultaneously breaking down communication and relationships among people. (It’s a 16 minute video but I highly highly recommend investing the time to watch it). Now as someone who is considered a part of both Gen X and the Millennial Generation (right on the cusp), I can understand both sides of the spectrum better than most. But I must admit, Sinek hit that ball right out of the park especiall...

"Moonstruck" (1987) unfolds in a deliberately over-dramatized narrative. This particular scene questions the futility & mundanity that is everyday Life (entwined with the events that led to this point in the story). The display of existential exasperation is perfection. It is delivered in a way that's both absurd and spectacular - resonating somewhat ubiquitously and hilariously through the ages. It is our family's absolute favourite movie and scene 😂 .

The sheer prospect of an adventure is what sets my soul on fire and truly keeps me alive and filled with purpose. Purpose is the lifeblood of our souls. It keeps us going, and motivated and gives us the drive to move forward.  The best adventures are the ones that are unplanned or the ones we don't look forward to. It's a joy and a privilege to be free and capable in every aspect. It's something that should be appreciated endlessly, and never be taken for granted. People who can meet and match us on the spectrum of exotic adventures are the best - and a gift from God. May we all be on the receiving end of such a partnership and the wonderment it brings.

Forgive me, while I chew on these three cashew nuts before I launch into a diatribe of this catastrophe I call Life.  Except, I'm not quite sure where to begin, dear reader. It's just that - for the first time in the six long years that I've called the desert my home - I find myself questioning my place here. And I can't quite put my finger on where it all went wrong...  Something's changed and upon further reflection, I think I've figured out exactly what that is. See, for the longest time - my entire life actually - I spent most of my time waiting for this thing to happen. Something. Anything.  I spent all my days in school, staring out at the horizon, waiting. I spent all my afternoons at University, up on the roof, counting airplanes, waiting. I spent all my time in London strolling through the streets and the halls of every art gallery, waiting. Then came the past 6 years... every year, rushing through the days... waiting. Waiting for the s...

I should enjoy Autumn since it's the season I was born in (in the Southern Hemisphere). But I find that I'm more of a Spring baby - keeping in tune with my Northern counterparts. For me, Spring smells like new beginnings & fresh days reeking with hope & promise. Autumn on the other hand always reminds me of impending doom - death knocking; calling restless souls to pass. It's the darkness that gets me, & this strange phenomenon where you're basking in the light of long summer days one moment & engulfed in black flames the next. It creeps up on us suddenly, out of no where & always leaves me emotionally unprepared for what's to come.  It's strange - these allegories we unintentionally make to justify the subtle ebb of existential angst. It mocks & taunts us - threatening to come in waves, yet remains teetering on the shore of consciousness.  It was somewhat ironic then, that I woke up today steeped in the undeniable truth that...

I woke up this morning somewhat startled, & for a moment I couldn't remember where I was. Then, at some point during the commute to work, a very vivid, distinct memory hit me out of nowhere. I was 9 or 10 years old & we were living in Cape Town - smack in the middle of winter. I remember because, who can forget those howling gale force winds rattling the back door's window panes, sounding eerily like a dead relative coming back to haunt us? I woke up habitually at 5am in the mornings & got ready for school in the dark. I drank some coffee before making the trek across the sandy heaps of the empty veld plains to stand on the corner of the main road. We stood there every morning, in the blistering wind & rain, waiting for a guy with a minibus to take us to school. It rained every morning that year, with the cold wind slapping us every which way until it sank into our bones. I used to try to shield my 6 year old sister from the nasty wind, while we...

Sometimes you meet someone who sets your soul on fire. It is very rare, but it does happen. And the blaze burns relentlessly, etching itself into every fiber of every membrane of your being - down to your very core - altering every corner of your existence. You cannot escape it.  To a large degree, you will find that there is not much you can do about it. There is no rationale governing the synapses and no clear scientific explanation as to why things are the way they are. Nothing adds up. It just happens. Maybe it's coincidence, maybe it's something else... Destiny. It reminds me of a photograph I once took of a spectacular sunset with Mount Vesuvius in the background. Mt. Vesuvius is famous for the volcanic eruption that drowned Pompeii in ash, only to be re-discovered centuries later. Locals believe and expect it to erupt once more, any day now. It's unpredictablility echoes in the halls of tempestuous probability - in much the same way that Destiny cavorts on t...

I'm always making fun of the male species but to be completely honest, some of my best friends and confidants are men. Some have been around for years since my blogger and early Facebook days and others have been around for decades - way back, from my school-loathing days. They're the ones I go to for advice, when I need to think clearly, or just to vent. But most of the time, we just catch up on this thing called Life. The conversations are always honest, insightful, heartfelt and funny, and leave me in a better place - grateful that God has allowed these people into my life. Their presence reminds me somewhat of this structure "The Treasury", in Petra... solid, perennial, unwavering, enduring. (There are women too, from those same days: School, Uni, London, Blog, FB). You all know who you are.  It's wonderful to be able to share our lives with people from all over the world, at varying intervals. It's what truly connects and binds us - weaving the t...

The very first time I went to Sweden, I walked around for two days in a daze. My brain struggled to comprehend the reality I was in because it was the epitome of everything I was taught to want and desire my entire life. Even the roadside Swedish wild flowers instantly took me back to my childhood in the 80's, growing up with my Uncle in my Grandmother's house in Johannesburg - watching Heidi on Sunday afternoons with the smell of Ma's rosemary and thyme pot roast and vegetables wafting through the air.  He is barely 3 years older than I am, so we spent most of our lives together like siblings - often marvelling at this remarkable thing called destiny. He looked at me that day, and asked what was wrong. "Nothing" I said... because how do you explain your life flashing before your very eyes, while simultaneously feeling a nostalgia for a place you have never been to before - yet feel like you've known forever? Three years after that day, and we were ba...

There is an enormous amount of power behind words or the "labels" we give ourselves. Saying things like "I'm so stupid"; "I'm messed up"; "I'm crazy", or "I'm bad" manifests itself - and even said in jest, it becomes ones reality. It's easy to be negative because it requires no effort and society does not reward positivity the way they do self-deprecation. There's a delicate balance between positivity and negativity and the language we use to speak to ourselves can make or break us. Instead of saying "I AM...", rather say "I FEEL..." - because "feelings" are fleeting and do not last, and they denote a temporary state that has a definite end. Saying "I FEEL sad" instead of "I AM sad" distingushes the character from the emotion - because what we feel does not define who we are.  On the flip side, we live in a society that is flooded with false positivity or...

Personal growth never was, nor will be a peaceful or glamorous experience. It doesn't come when you're "ready" or at a time that's convenient for you. It hits hard, in the most unexpected places, at the most unexpected times. It turns you inside out, leaving you gutted and raw, gasping for breath like a fish out of water. And the more you fight it, the more drenched you are in existential anguish, desperately searching for an end but only prolonging the inevitable. The only way out, is to surrender to it and learn the lessons. "Life is a storm, my friend. You will bask in the sunlight one moment, be shattered on the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes." ~  Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo

You can't save everyone.  The truth is, some people are committed to their suffering and regularly feed their pain with defeatism, because they don't know who they are without it. Pain and Suffering becomes a part of their identity and they actually derive gratification from being in that state. Simply put: they are secretly in love with and committed to being miserable. You can't save everyone. They have to save themselves first by recognizing that we are not defined by where we come from or what happened to us while we were there.

"I believe churches are meant for praising God. But so are 2am car rides, showers, coffee shops, the gym, conversations with friends, strangers, etc. Don't let a building confine your faith because we will never change the world by just going to church, we need to be the church."  Similarly we will never change the world by just going to Mosque, we need to be the Mosque. The essence of worship is not limited to rituals, it also includes action and requires us to be proactive. There is an element of worship to be found in the simplest things: a "thank you"; being good to those who can do nothing for you; a smile; sharing a piece of bread; being good to your friends, family, neighbours; staying conscious of God; and at every point of gratitude we express. Worship is so much more than the confines our feeble minds have placed on it.

There’s something enthralling about climbing an active volcano. The very act proposes the threat of annihilation at any moment – and yet you will not feel more alive doing so. Mother earth will not hesitate to eviscerate your ass with vigour. But in the seething cauldron churning beneath the earth’s crust, you can almost hear her fragile heart beating. For someone who’s always intrigued by death’s secrets, it becomes a game of roulette. There is something reassuring about being on a live volcano. See, with every mass destruction comes something less ominous - the birth of something new. And THAT, is always a beautiful thing.