11:57PM

I was always curious to know what's happening in the stars. Not that I believe that anyone can predict the future - absolutely not. But there were definitely cosmic events at play at some point in the past that have somehow influenced my life. At least I think so. When I had this conversation with a friend and a bunch of colleagues a few months ago, I was met with wild, savage laughter. "There is no way that a planet, any planet moving around the galaxy, can have an impact on anyone", I was told.  That may be true I reckoned. And then I did something even I wasn't planning to do. I pointed to the moon - which at that point was gloriously full - and asked the group to explain to me how that ball in the sky controls our tides and all kinds of activity here on earth, including accelerated agricultural (and hair) growth and well-being, as well as influencing the behaviour of many people according to long established beliefs?  And if indeed the moon had the...

So there I was, sitting with my coffee and scrolling through Facebook on a Friday morning when I came across this video by Simon Sinek and Tom Bilyeu on what's missing in the Millenial generation.  And my good Lord, I have never ever come across a description of Millennials - especially in this current wave of Generational Wars - that is better articulated and elucidated. If  ever! Sinek eloquently highlights the growing epidemic of failed parenting strategies coupled with the increasingly delusional world of technology – highlighting how technology feeds our delusions while simultaneously breaking down communication and relationships among people. (It’s a 16 minute video but I highly highly recommend investing the time to watch it). Now as someone who is considered a part of both Gen X and the Millennial Generation (right on the cusp), I can understand both sides of the spectrum better than most. But I must admit, Sinek hit that ball right out of the park especiall...

Sometimes it's difficult to believe and remember that nothing in life is static or predictable unless we want it to be that way - and even then nothing is guaranteed. Possibilities exist beyond our wildest imaginations. Realities can change in the blink of an eye. Everything is just a decision away. I woke up thinking of my time up in the northern parts of KSA. Prior to these years, I had never imagined that such places existed. And while I was there having this extraordinary experience, I never imagined that I would someday end up here today. Life is strange like that. We never know what awaits us.

The sheer prospect of an adventure is what sets my soul on fire and truly keeps me alive and filled with purpose. Purpose is the lifeblood of our souls. It keeps us going, and motivated and gives us the drive to move forward.  The best adventures are the ones that are unplanned or the ones we don't look forward to. It's a joy and a privilege to be free and capable in every aspect. It's something that should be appreciated endlessly, and never be taken for granted. People who can meet and match us on the spectrum of exotic adventures are the best - and a gift from God. May we all be on the receiving end of such a partnership and the wonderment it brings.

I should enjoy Autumn since it's the season I was born in (in the Southern Hemisphere). But I find that I'm more of a Spring baby - keeping in tune with my Northern counterparts. For me, Spring smells like new beginnings & fresh days reeking with hope & promise. Autumn on the other hand always reminds me of impending doom - death knocking; calling restless souls to pass. It's the darkness that gets me, & this strange phenomenon where you're basking in the light of long summer days one moment & engulfed in black flames the next. It creeps up on us suddenly, out of no where & always leaves me emotionally unprepared for what's to come.  It's strange - these allegories we unintentionally make to justify the subtle ebb of existential angst. It mocks & taunts us - threatening to come in waves, yet remains teetering on the shore of consciousness.  It was somewhat ironic then, that I woke up today steeped in the undeniable truth that...

If people are doomed to repeat history, then let me repeat those parts that are forever emblazoned in my mind and embedded in my soul. Those parts that took my breath away and left me all at once enamored and bewildered... lost in my own synapses and paralyzed with wonder.  Let me drown there - in the depths of the annals of time, sewn into the lining between existential realism and the ether of the universe. Let me wander for an eternity, among the cosmos, floating away on an ethereal cloud, drifting slowly with the wind, in a dreamless sleep. Never to wake again.

I woke up this morning somewhat startled, & for a moment I couldn't remember where I was. Then, at some point during the commute to work, a very vivid, distinct memory hit me out of nowhere. I was 9 or 10 years old & we were living in Cape Town - smack in the middle of winter. I remember because, who can forget those howling gale force winds rattling the back door's window panes, sounding eerily like a dead relative coming back to haunt us? I woke up habitually at 5am in the mornings & got ready for school in the dark. I drank some coffee before making the trek across the sandy heaps of the empty veld plains to stand on the corner of the main road. We stood there every morning, in the blistering wind & rain, waiting for a guy with a minibus to take us to school. It rained every morning that year, with the cold wind slapping us every which way until it sank into our bones. I used to try to shield my 6 year old sister from the nasty wind, while we...

It's surprisingly easy to get sucked into watching lifestyle shows in the middle of the night. One minute you're watching Gary cut into wooden panels for his new patio & 3 hours later you hate the coffee table Shirley chose in her home makeover. What I find intriguing is that there's always something to learn while observing these vanity projects. For one, I'm a Hoarder. I like collecting things but not just things... I love collecting memories & people too.  In my heart I keep everything and everyone that I love. In my ears you will find music - every song my soul has ever consumed, stored neatly in chronological order, ready to be devoured at any moment. There is also a special archive: my mother's voice, her embrace, as well as the sound of laughter so gentle, it still stirs & erupts my own joy. I collect it all.  Hoarding itself is not glamorous. It fits the same category as anorexia & bulimia - they're all about control & no...

At some point this week, I was sitting by myself staring blissfully out of the window... blissful because for the first time in a long time, I didn't have something requiring my urgent attention. And naturally, I did what I do best. I began to think... specifically about the kind of life I spent years meticulously crafting. Thing is, from the time we're born, we're told that settling down and having bonafide roots are not only what we should aspire to, but something that we cannot function without. It's a birthright. They say. And anything other than that is simply not acceptable by any standard.  I started thinking about my life over the decades, and that no matter how much I tried to play by the rules and follow the norm, I was always thrown off course... sometimes violently, most times against my will. Why then, did I persist? Why even try? Why reach for something that's not there, was never there - something that was never even meant to be on the radar ...

The very first time I went to Sweden, I walked around for two days in a daze. My brain struggled to comprehend the reality I was in because it was the epitome of everything I was taught to want and desire my entire life. Even the roadside Swedish wild flowers instantly took me back to my childhood in the 80's, growing up with my Uncle in my Grandmother's house in Johannesburg - watching Heidi on Sunday afternoons with the smell of Ma's rosemary and thyme pot roast and vegetables wafting through the air.  He is barely 3 years older than I am, so we spent most of our lives together like siblings - often marvelling at this remarkable thing called destiny. He looked at me that day, and asked what was wrong. "Nothing" I said... because how do you explain your life flashing before your very eyes, while simultaneously feeling a nostalgia for a place you have never been to before - yet feel like you've known forever? Three years after that day, and we were ba...

In every place I visit, my mind wanders in the historical depts of the eons, forever wondering what people were like over the centuries in that place - imagining all the people that were tormented by their time and circumstances, those that have loved and lost, those that overcame and triumphed.  The truth is, for the vast majority, life was a trial plagued by poverty and disease and people were lucky if they lived past the age of 30. These romantic notions we have of a golden age and what once was is flawed and inaccurate. But... still... but... I can't help feeling that life is easier when the focus is on surviving every day and not accumulating and hoarding things... When what matters is being alive and not what car you drive.

There is an enormous amount of power behind words or the "labels" we give ourselves. Saying things like "I'm so stupid"; "I'm messed up"; "I'm crazy", or "I'm bad" manifests itself - and even said in jest, it becomes ones reality. It's easy to be negative because it requires no effort and society does not reward positivity the way they do self-deprecation. There's a delicate balance between positivity and negativity and the language we use to speak to ourselves can make or break us. Instead of saying "I AM...", rather say "I FEEL..." - because "feelings" are fleeting and do not last, and they denote a temporary state that has a definite end. Saying "I FEEL sad" instead of "I AM sad" distingushes the character from the emotion - because what we feel does not define who we are.  On the flip side, we live in a society that is flooded with false positivity or...

Personal growth never was, nor will be a peaceful or glamorous experience. It doesn't come when you're "ready" or at a time that's convenient for you. It hits hard, in the most unexpected places, at the most unexpected times. It turns you inside out, leaving you gutted and raw, gasping for breath like a fish out of water. And the more you fight it, the more drenched you are in existential anguish, desperately searching for an end but only prolonging the inevitable. The only way out, is to surrender to it and learn the lessons. "Life is a storm, my friend. You will bask in the sunlight one moment, be shattered on the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes." ~  Alexandre Dumas, The Count of Monte Cristo

You can't save everyone.  The truth is, some people are committed to their suffering and regularly feed their pain with defeatism, because they don't know who they are without it. Pain and Suffering becomes a part of their identity and they actually derive gratification from being in that state. Simply put: they are secretly in love with and committed to being miserable. You can't save everyone. They have to save themselves first by recognizing that we are not defined by where we come from or what happened to us while we were there.

There’s something enthralling about climbing an active volcano. The very act proposes the threat of annihilation at any moment – and yet you will not feel more alive doing so. Mother earth will not hesitate to eviscerate your ass with vigour. But in the seething cauldron churning beneath the earth’s crust, you can almost hear her fragile heart beating. For someone who’s always intrigued by death’s secrets, it becomes a game of roulette. There is something reassuring about being on a live volcano. See, with every mass destruction comes something less ominous - the birth of something new. And THAT, is always a beautiful thing.